Andromeda Strain… On Credibility.

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Well. That was just bad. I just got done watching the first half of the A&E remake of Michael Crichton’s Andromeda Strain. It’s way too long. The script is contrived and dumbed down (since it’s a remake from a good movie, I should say “stupided-up”) with all sorts of dumb government conspiracies and people with personal problems: the lead scientist / teacher has had an affair with a co-ed, causing a divorce and a troubled teen (who will no doubt find himself in harms way), double-crossing, back-stabbing government agents and super secret military projects, a junkie journalist in rehab who, surprise, gets the scoop, which, surprise, drives him to use coke again, scientist guy who doesn’t like the other scientist guy he’s working with because of “what happened in Houston”, a cast so diverse you would think they were cast by the Rainbow Coalition Diversity Division, and they are all sooo fantastically cut and in shape (’cause scientist have so much tie to work out) and all look tan and rested and ready to go (except Rickey Schroeder, who probably couldn’t tan if you launched him into the sun)…. the contrived spirit of the thing goes on and on… You don’t care about anyone in the movie really, they’re all cardboard cutouts from every bad sci-fi movie you’ve ever seen. The animals who perish in the inevitable lab testing or at ground zero earned more sympathy. You kinda hope either they all get infected with the Andromeda Strain and die, or you do so you’re put out of your misery and won’t be watching the rest of this two part disaster tomorrow night… oh, I forgot to mention the super secret advanced buckeyball nanotubes. Yeah, the same double-super-secret ones we’ve been reading about in “Popular Mechanics” for the last fifteen years?

No Comments to “Andromeda Strain… On Credibility.”

  1. By Cliff, May 28, 2008 @ 6:36 pm

    Couldn’t agree more. One of the worst remake’s I’ve ever seen.

  2. By Johnny, May 29, 2008 @ 4:46 pm

    Damn it all! I had high hopes for the new Andromeda Strain. The book is in my all time favorites list and I was hoping for a good update on film. Oh well, I guess I should know better than to have high hopes for a book to movie to mini-series adaptation.

  3. By Cliff, May 29, 2008 @ 11:19 pm

    I couldn’t agree more.

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