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Teaching And The Gay Issue – Out At Work.

Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. You know the story…. busy. Not only did we have Memorial Day stuff to do all week-end, but Greg and I finally got around to installing the whole house fan that has been laying on the garage floor for the last three weeks. Will have pictures of the work in progress soon.

But that is not what this post is about. It’s about tomorrow….. Judgment Day. I am, as of Friday May 22, for all intents and purposes, out as a teacher who is gay.

I have been out at work since the mid 90’s (the first outing is actually a funny story that will be told another time), but Ihave not been out since I started subbing a couple of years ago. As a sub, that is not the kind of thing you need to deal with in the class room. Subbing is hard enough already without having to deal with this kind of issue in the class. But in this case, this is no ordinary subbing situation.

I have a three week stint as a sub for an economics class that will last until the end of this semester. The job is at Fresno High School, the same school where I completed my student teaching. Many of the students in the classes are students I taught during that period in my pedagogy training (yes, I dislike the term pedagogy too) and we have a familiarity with each other that a full time teacher would have with his students. Teaching at FHS is like coming home in a way. Granted, many of those students were wise-acres and goof-offs and all around yahoo’s. They were complete pains in the arses sometimes! One of the common insults to anything unpleasant or annoying is to call it gay – “this assignment’s gay”, to which I would follow with “so, that paper likes other papers of the same sex”, or “hey, it’s the twenty first century, so what if it’s gay!”, or other snappy comments. Some students would even inquire about my love life, asking of I was married, and when I said no, they would suggest that I was “a player”. I would often play along for a little bit, in a sarcastic way, then get the kids back on track with their assignment.

On Friday one of the students from my student teaching days pursued the same line of questioning. This time though it was different. Instead of having that joking quality about it, the conversation was of an honest nature. The student, one of the more thoughtful ones, first asked if I was married. I said no, but indicated that I was attached. He then asked if I had kids, or if i ever wanted one. I said no, not at this time. He then asked the question that, up till now, no one had ever asked in a serious honest fashion: “does it have anything to do with your sexual orientation?”. Now I had always promised myself that I would not back away from this topic and would answer truthfully if the question was asked;. But i was not sure if I had the tenacity or courage to follow through with honesty. After all, it really isn’t the students business what occurs in my private life. On the other hand, kids are smart. We all remember the teachers in our high school years who were obviously and not so obviously hiding that they were gay. Well, I found that I did have the strength to keep my promise. I told the student that “that is probable” and went on with the lesson.

Given that this conversation took place just as the class was starting, and most of the yahoo’s sit on the other side of the room and were busy socializing, the conversation was under the radar and I doubt more than three students were even aware of the revelation. But I know that word travels fast, especially now with Facebook, MySpace and Twitter and all. I will be thoroughly shocked if I don’t face a barrage of questions when I get into class tomorrow, especially from fifth period. It will be curious to see how this adventure plays out.

Wish me luck.