What I Did On Friday

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I found a pigeon having seizures on my back porch yesterday. It was flapping uncoordinatedly, and its eyes were blinking and twitching wildly. I thought it was dying and on its last legs. I was very sad as I felt I could do nothing for it. It reminded me of our parrot Emmet, the green-naped lorikeet that passed away about five years ago. I was thinking “Great, this thing has bird flu or something, and now Miss Bird, our current black-cap lorikeet who at this moment is sticking her tongue in my ear, could be exposed and die. I definitely didn’t want to touch the thing so I use two pieces of cardboard as big birdie tongs and put the flailing pigeon in the bushes on the sid eof the house. I looked in on the bird from time to time, waiting for the inevitable so I could dispose of the poor thing. Well the inevitable never came. Instead of dying, it recovered within two hours, and eventually flew away. I seem to recall an article by bird and aviery expert Dick Schroeder about pigeons and epileptic seizures. Greg’s mom suggested the pigeon ate fermented berries and got drunk. Man, I hope I don’t look that out of it when I get drunk.