Climategate / Dopenhagen / Obama… Who’s To Blame???

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Surprise! Party!
Yeah, we just thought we’d drop in!
Where’s your icebox?
Where’s the punch?
Eww, house-a-tosis!

Who’s to blame when parties really get out of hand?
Who’s to blame when they get poorly planned?
Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoooo–oooooo…

Crashers get bombed, slobs make a mess
Ya know sometimes they’ll even ruin your wife’s dress
Crashers gettin’ bombed. (Who’s to blame?)
Can you pull it back in line?
Can you salvage it in time?

What can you do to save a party?
Parcheesi? Charades? A spur-of-the-moment
Scavenger hunt, or Queen of the Nile? (Wooooh!)
Who turned out the lights? (Wooooh!)

Bombed, crashers gettin’ bombed
Crasher’s gettin’ bombed, bombed, bombed, bombed, well who’s to blame?

Who’s to blame when situations degenerate?
Disgusting things you’d never anticipate
Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooo–ooooooo…

People get sick, they play the wrong games
Ya know, it can ruin your name!
Crashers gettin’ bombed. (Who’s to blame?)
Can you pull it back in line?
Can you salvage it in time?

Woooooh!
It shouldn’t be difficult!
Try not to condemn!
O.K. who ordered pizza?
I’ll be tactful when making the rounds
Be tactful when making the rounds
and maybe you can save a party….

Party gone out of bounds!
Gone out of bounds!
Party gone out of bounds!
Gone out of bounds!

You know the world is coming to end when the B52’s can be seen as prescient!

But it gets better. Let me explain.

The world is in a weird place right now. So much confusion. So many questions.  Ever since the CRU e-mails and code made their way onto the internet, the climate science / global warming cabal has found itself in a funk, and it’s ruining their little party! They want answers dammit! Some are now blaming the Russians for the hacking. I have another theory, and it’s a good one!

Ready?

OK!

Many predicted that if CERN tried to restart the Super Hadron Collider, either the world was either going to be swallowed up by micro black holes (hasn’t happened so far), or because of the quantum nature of the higgs-boson particle, that it can travel through time, it doesn’t want to be discovered. It is often called the “God Particle” after all. Thus the very act of trying to discover the particle would stop the LHC from ever firing – note how the actions of one bird caused a severe delay the reboot process. That was one-heck-of-a-strategically-placed bread crumb! But there is a third possibility. Maybe the effects of the higgs boson do travel through time, but they don’t prevent its discovery…. but, however, they do strange things to the world in a quantum way. Obviously, the LHC has succeeded sometime in the near future of creating the “God Particle”, and since the effects of such are quantum and not anchored in time, well, the effects are being felt now! And one of the effect is… drum roll please…. to cause the CRU e-mails and code to go all quantum on us and shift from a secured server at the University of East Anglia to one in Vlad’s house that is quite open to the web! It’s so easy to see…. And it’s quantum to boot!

Who can argue with that!

On further reflection, there are other strange things going on in the world today that can now be explained. Many liberals are fuming over the lack of “liberalness” in Obama’s recent policy decisions, such as the delay in closing Gitmo, renewal of the hated Patriot act, and the lack of effort to repeal Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, along with his refusal to side with proponents of gay marriage. And then there is his recent decision to extend the war in Afghanistan. His popularity should still be in the sixties! None of this should be happening! It isn’t right.

Well, chalk up another one to the dreaded Higgs-Boson!!!

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